So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
i out mim tonsoeep
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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