We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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