got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
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