I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
