Screwed.edu
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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