Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
