i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
