So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
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