Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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