I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
