Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Terrible idea I love it
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
