Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
