Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
