It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
This show inspires me to have sex in space
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
