Im at strip club and am horny
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I enjoy the company of your penis
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
