im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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