If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
