I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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