Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
