Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
