i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
