Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
