just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
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