escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
