I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
