I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Randomize
