To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
