Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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