Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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