First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I am never drinking with the goths again.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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