Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
