btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
BRING THE BAGELS
Randomize
