i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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