I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
