We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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