I like my sex mixed with concussions.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
