how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
He kissed a someone with a penis
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
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