i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
