when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
