This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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