this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
