We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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