Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
