Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
she was so not down for the gang bang
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize