the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Randomize
