All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Randomize
