Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
