So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
