So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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