Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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