Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
