I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Randomize
